7 Things You Must Avoid For Online Dating Success
Online dating has fast become the number one way for singles to meet. However, simply downloading a dating app and throwing up a profile isn’t enough. It takes work to create the perfect profile in order to attract that perfect person. And let’s face it — men and women browse profiles differently. Where women generally take more time to read a bio, men tend to concentrate more on looks. Knowing how to create a profile which will excite and pique the curiosity of visitors is one of the keys to online dating success. Whatever you do, avoid these common mistakes when creating your perfect profile.
- You’re too modest
One of the main things that people look for in a potential mate is someone who excites their imagination. It’s difficult to look at a picture and a description and get a sense of what that person is like, yet that’s exactly how online dating works.
In order to catch the interest of the person browsing you, you need to sound like you are an exciting person. There’s nothing which kills excitement more than too much modesty. An example of this is to downplay your skills and achievements. Ask yourself, which of these two statements sounds more interesting: “I love to play guitar and piano,” or “I play guitar and piano but not very well.” Talk about what you do, what skills you have, and don’t sell yourself short. If you do, why shouldn’t someone else?
- You’re a braggart
The polar opposite of being too modest, the braggart loves to puff up their chest and talk about how amazing they are. People can smell insincerity a mile away, and those who brag come off as arrogant. It’s an interest-killer as far as potential suitors are concerned, and many people consider it an instant turn-off.
The trick is to highlight your skills and achievements but without overselling them. Your attributes, if interesting enough, should sell themselves. Instead, try talking about things you enjoy doing. You can list these items, just don’t go overboard. While it’s perfectly okay to say, “I love driving through mountains and the spray of the ocean on my face while boating”, statements such as, “I love taking my 225hp Porche 911 Turbo for a spin from my luxury waterfront condo to the exclusive yacht club where I keep my awesome 16-foot cabin cruiser” make you sound like an arrogant, self-possessed person.
- You have a list of demands
There’s nothing wrong with having high standards. Everyone should. It’s just not okay to say what they are, at least publicly. Printing your lengthy “shopping list” of must-have attributes in a potential match is a huge turnoff, even for those who fit the bill. While mentioning a few qualities is fine, where people go wrong is having a long list of them.
There’s a big difference between stating what you’re looking for and what you aren’t. While it’s true that most people would like to avoid wasting their time being contacted by others to whom they’re not attracted, remember that online dating is a number’s game. You may feel like you’re saving time by painting the perfect picture of your potential mate, but saying things like, “don’t contact me unless you make over a hundred grand a year, have a great job, are well educated, own a newer car and no how to treat a lady” will make you look shallow and one-dimensional. There will be plenty of opportunities to weed out non-preferences later.
- You don’t come across as being fun
Having a sense of humor is one of the most highly-sought qualities people search for. Writing a funny profile is an excellent way to get people interested and engaged, and many a connection has been forged based on humor alone. If you get them to laugh, you’ve won half the battle. Besides, there’re a lot of things you can get away with if your profile is funny, even a little edgy. You can even break rules such as being a braggart or being too modest if you make it humorous and make them laugh.
While not everyone is a comedian, there’re other ways to look like you’re a fun person to be around. Goofy pictures in your profile are another great way, or at least, show photos of you having fun with your friends and interacting with others. Otherwise, if you don’t demonstrate a capacity to enjoy life then you’ll come off as being dour and, quite frankly, a downer. Don’t tell them you like to have fun — show them.
- You use too many cliches
“I’m not into games.” “No hook-ups.” “I like having fun with my friends.” How many times have you seen these lines in a dating profile? Probably a lot. Then why are they in yours?
Using cliched statements telegraphs that you have little imagination, that you take your inspiration from the crowd. Instead, dare to be different. Talk about something unique you enjoy doing, even if it’s something silly such as “sitting at my table and staring at the walls, wondering when they’re going to cave in.” Strive for the uniqueness which matches your unique personality and let it shine.
That goes for photos as well. Remember that cameras can go anywhere, so why are you taking bathroom and car selfies? And guys, no woman wants to see you pose next to a tiger.
- Your profile is empty
Don’t do it. Just don’t.
- You’re boring
The sad fact is nobody is going to be interested in you if you don’t look like you have some semblance of a life. Remember, a dating profile isn’t a resume; it’s designed to capture someone’s interest, not be a boring list of facts and dates. It begins with the pictures you choose. Taking a bunch of selfies of yourself doing nothing, and having nothing to say in your profile is a definite interest killer. Be exciting, daring, goofy, active, and above all – interesting.
If you don’t have any hobbies, then get some. Develop interests. Everyone likes to do something — the problem is when “watching TV” is the only one you have. Don’t be that person.
Succeeding in the online dating world can be challenging. However, as long as you avoid doing these seven interest-killing things in your profile, you should ha